Michelle Obama Watch

I noticed the same “topless” headline. I guess it was a slow day.

How dare they! If I heard anyone call one of my daughters “sassy” at ages 20 and 18 let alone 7, I guarantee that they would think long and hard before letting the word roll out of their mouth.

This is the kind of “reporting” that just infuriates me. Its as if Michelle, Sasha, and Malia are “non-persons”. It reminds me of a Twilight Zone episode I saw many many years ago where a family lived in a glass enclosure. They found out later that their life was being viewed by others akin to being in a zoo. Any and everything they did amazed the “zoo-goers”; almost in wonderment that the family had personalities, ideals, a sense of self-worth, and goals before they were “discovered” by the “zoo-keepers and goers”.

Oh dear! I was working on a design presentation last night and in big bold letters for my client, I described today’s women (not Black women but ALL American women) as “sassy”.

In my women’s lifestyle consulting business, “sassy” is a positive word about women who speak their minds. And I consult the dictionary regularly. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve used the word as a compliment.

I post a wide variety of Obama News on my Anne of Carversville website, and I’m stunned that viewers can’t get enough of it. This MOW blog is also housed on my website, trying to give my readers a wide variety of opinion and views about the Obama Administration and Americans living together in a VERY TROUBLED world.

Today I have a letter from Melissa Eldridge to the gay community re Obama’s choice of Rick Warren to speak at the Inauguration. I’m curious MOW about your views on that decision.

Eldridge asks for some understanding, insights and neutrality within the gay community on Obama’s choice of Warren, basically arguing that tolerance is in short supply in America and we must find it.

I assume that you agree with the gay community, that Obama has made a bad choice with Warren. They are as offended by his decision re Warren, as you are at Huff Po for using the word “sassy”.

I openly admit in advance that I will for sure run afoul of acceptable comments to many people, based on what I just read here at MIchelle Obama Watch.

I apologize heartily, but I do think you might consider that many of us are walking on eggshells, not to offend, and at the same time speak the contemporary vernacular that is actually defined in many ways by the HipHop and contemporary Black Culture communities.

(I capitalized those words as a positive gesture, not a negative one. Hope that’s OK).

It NEVER would have occurred to me that Sassy was a “bad” word, one that would offend some people. NEVER. Call me “stupid”, “ignorant”, “uncaring”, or far worse.

If I produced a word review for you re “sassy”, I think the word is plastered all over contemporary Black culture, music, and YouTube. I bet you (without proof) that it’s been used in “Essence”. I could be wrong re “Essence”; trust me, I’m not looking for a fight.

Is it OK for me to word the sentence that way??? If not, I apologize in advance, because I — for one — am really trying to move us beyond our quickness to pull the trigger with each other.

From what I just read here, I’m kinda depressed about the future. Sorry for that comment, too. I apologize.

Wow! If there’s anything wrong with “wow”, I apologize for that, too.

Basically, I just apologize. How’s that?

Re my design presentation about today’s women of every skin hue, the word “sassy” stands. From what I’ve read on MOW, the word is appropriate. Indeed, today’s American women speak their minds — and that is a good thing.

If that sentence offends, I apologize. Clearly, speaking English is more challenging than ever in America. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

I also agree that sassy was a poor word choice to describe a little girl.

However, this sentence also stood out for me in the HuffPost entry: “Sasha stepped off the plane a new woman.”

I didn’t know that a seven-year-old is considered a “woman.”

The media is getting creepier by the day.

I’m a 50 yr old black woman. In “my time” I’ve experienced plenty of insensitive remarks/words/phrases (some the speaker may have realized, many times not). The reality is that by now, many of these so-called insults, like referring to a black woman/girl as sassy, have simply lost the impetus it may have had even only 20 years ago. And I say, thank goodness.

Most people under 30 have no idea why sassy would be offensive and would never connect it to our old pain. And frankly, in my view, even in the old sense a black person with sass was someone to be admired for standing up for themselves. The fact that white people took that as an affront bears that out.

I happen to like the word sassy. It’s a great word that we should be able to reclaim, while accepting that it once was often used to admonish blacks getting “out of their place” with whites. To be fair, sass and sassy were also often used to describe or admonish anyone (not just blacks and especially children) who were perceived to be exhibiting disrespectful behavior.

To me, sass/sassy far was always far more universally applied than say, “uppity” which was rarely used without the accompanying “N” word. I would definitely find uppity to still be offensive. But sassy? C’mon…anybody can be sassy in the negative sense as well as in the positive sense. No one would raise an eyebrow if a black person called a white person sassy these days…unlike years ago. Sassy is now an equal opportunity word.

It’s time for our ire about this word to be released…let it go, get over it. As for the old schoolers who still slip it in as an insult, so what? They’re a dying breed. The proof? Barack Obama is our president-elect. The less of this kind of stuff we saddle our next generations with, the better. Believe me, there will still be plenty of sensitive words and phrases that will live on forever and rightly so.

Give HuffPo a break, they were the unofficial Barack Obama for President website. Their staff is by and large full of young people who think being sassy has some kind of fashionable, devil-may-care, in-your-face connotation. By the way, I just got a sassy new haircut.

For me, a 50+ year old Black woman, “sassy” is akin to being called “missy”. But, to call a girl-child sassy – regardless of color – is quite inappropriate to me. In my day, being called sassy was usually followed by a back-hand slap across the lips.

Speaking my mind, however, does not make me “sassy”. Speaking my mind takes me one step closer to being a self-actualized human being who must be taken seriously.

Well, there are two definitions of sassy. One means rude and disrespectful, the other means precocious. Sasha is definitely precocious, not sure she goes so far as sassy at seven.

The most humorous thing in these responses is the very sincere remarks by Anne of Carversville, who then muddles it all up by not knowing the last name of one of the most outspoken lesbians in the country, Melissa Etheridge. I don’t even know what to make of that, who doesn’t know Melissa Etheridge, I don’t get it.

Anyways, to much more important topics, Michelle has released her holiday email, asking that we think about helping others. Good Idea!
http://www.obama-mamas.com/blog/?p=127

Are we really going to get up in arms about every little thing that comes out in the press and racialize everything? This is going to be a pain for 4 years. And yes I am a black woman!

I think it was inappropriate to call Sasha “sassy.” I predict things will only get worse, since we now have, a polished black woman in the white house. And two smart and respectful, little black girls.

Mainstream media is not used to these images. They are used to engaging in stereotypical images of black women/girls. I think that is why Michelle has opted to focus on her daughters, while in the white house.

She understands how important it is to protect our girl black children, from a society that is often vicious to them.

As a followup to my comment, I agree about muddling Melissa Etheridge. What in the world was I thinking??? Yes, it was very, very early am and no sleep.

Yet, I know how Eldridge got there . . . activist Eldridge Cleaver was clearly seeping out of my brain. In his famous book “Soul on Ice”, Cleaver dealt with racial pride, pain and struggle.

I read that book and many others in my long and activist support of the American civil rights movements. And yet . . . I’m dead on arrival re “sassy”.

Reading all the comments, it’s clear that people like me will continue to unintentionally offend others. And offended you are.

I tracked down a current magazine called “Sassy”, published in Hawaii and targeted to young women. If you Google it, you won’t find three white girls on the masthead.

The “sassy” misunderstanding will either continue to reinforce our beliefs of each other’s intentions, or 20 years from now, it will evaporate with today’s younger people not feeling the same way about the word.

In a positive gesture to move us forward (and I am dead serious here), perhaps you could collaborate on an article — what are the 50 worst words, phrases, comments that today’s writers (predominantly white, of course) could use that are considered offensive to readers of Michelle Obama Watch.

Instead of just “nailing folks”, you can educate them (us). It should also bring good traffic to your website.

Moving 50 words or phrases off the “breakdown in communications” list would be a positive movement forward for everyone. If you educate people, then you can better hold them responsible for their “offensive” gestures.

Happy Hollidays to all! With high hopes that we improve our communications and belief in each other in 2009.

@Noreen I did speak out about the treatment of Palin and her children and caught plenty of flack for doing so.

http://www.whataboutourdaughters.com/2008/09/obama-repudiates-lib-bloggers-on-palins-son-and-daughteras-i-predicted/

Choose you battles!!!

@Mthomas Who is fighting? What battle? We’re commenting on a blog. Nobody is fighting? There clearly are a large number of people who share my concern about their use of the word “sassy.” There are people who disagree. That is their right. The post was put up for discussion and that is what is happening. There is no battle.

UrbanbyDesign, it was the “Sasha stepped off the plane a new woman” sentence that caught my eye, also.

Add this to the use of the word “sassy”, and for me, personally, I was left wondering whether the HuffPo writers temporarily forgot that they were in fact referring to a sweet little girl, and not an MTV video vamp who’d just donned her shades ready for “lights, camera, action” or a beach bound Samantha from Sex In The City.

I’m in full agreement that the media is getting creepier by the day….

Here are 3 definitions found on Dictionary.com:

sas·sy 1 (sās’ē) Pronunciation Key
adj. sas·si·er, sas·si·est

1. Rude and disrespectful; impudent.
2. Lively and spirited; jaunty.
3. Stylish; chic: a sassy little hat.

Please note: I am an African American woman. I’m sure #3 was how the word was being used. Sometimes it can be so petty to always look for the negative. I do realize that the word ’sassy’ has been used to mean being rude, ’sassy-mouthed’, etc., and particularly in our community historically, but I have heard it used a zillion times in a positive light, and I have heard it used regarding girls that have a lot of spunk and confidence. It is not a universally negative word, though it has been used negatively often and for a long time. Though I understand that the word has been used negatively, sometimes I feel that we are so quick to get pissed off about something. It’s like we are just waiting for a chance to raise hell! Sasha looks ADORABLE in her shades, and I’m confident that this is what the writer meant. So everyone calm down, continue to feel the positive force that is in the air with this election, don’t always let what others have to say ruffle your feathers, especially about something like this, always check your facts and definitions, and let’s continue to bask in the beauty of having brown babies in the White House!

Have a positive and great night.

The Obama ,
Family has a call to serve we as American
citizens should first respect our new leader,and be thankful that he has not only awife but a God fearing spirit within himself
and for his daughters lets not loose focus on what his role is HE IS THE PRESIDENT! Please allow these girls to grow and mature to become great women one day ,and not pull down to the lowest factor ,where others are pulling from to minimize what President&Mrs.Obama have worked to do by teaching ,vision ,morals,character in their childrens lives.
Lets focus on being a diversified nation ,worring less on trivial things and focusing daily on doing one positive thing for someone else NOT YOURSELF and we will see how much progress will come from that